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Murdering Mary SueMurdering Mary SueMurdering Mary Sue by *Cei-Ellem
Every aspiring writer has met her at least once, whether in his own works or in those of others. The alluring temptation of a perfect character taunts the author from one side while his muse urges him to keep writing from the other. Who wouldn't love her? She's the most beautiful, talented, fantastic woman in the universe, with not a flaw in sight. Every woman wants to be her; every man wants to marry her, so why would anyone want to kill her? Who would want to murder Mary Sue?
I would. I and many greater authors have been working hard to keep this succubus in her proper place: the trash can. Mary Sue is one of the worst enemies of good fiction, second only to poor spelling and grammar. And the seductress tempts even the most cautious writer. Her many disguises can make her difficult to spot, allowing her to weave her way into every plot twist and turn, slowly destroying the author's work. By the time shes found, she may have done so much damage that the
unwrappedyou: complete packageunwrapped by `YouInventedMe
me: various useless parts
Another year has passed and I'm again going to do the holiday card thing!
Well, everyone loves receiving mail, right? And holiday cards are pretty awesome, I think. So I’m giving you all a chance to receive a free holiday card from me - you know, to spread the holiday spirit around a little. I will ship them everywhere, so it doesn’t really matter where you live as long as you are comfortable giving me your address. And also, please do not hesitate to ask for a card in case I don't know you too well (or I don't know you at all) - I will happily send you one if you'd like.
If you’d like to receive a postcard, send me a note with your address and any other details - like, if you’d like a special message or perhaps a doodle? I can’t promise you will receive it in time for the holidays, but I will try my best.
The deadline for this is Sunday, December 8 - after that, I will go and send the cards and hope they reach everyone in time.